Baha'i's Fast for 19 days out of the year, meaning we don't take in food or drink from sunrise to sunset. We considered it one of the pillars of our faith, a time of reflection, detachment, and rejuvenation.
Fasting is always an interesting time for me. My whole world is turned around.
There are the day to day practical changes. I have not been exercising. During the day I need to maintain some hydration while at night, after I have eaten and digested, It is already late and I am tired. I am less social during the fast. I have less energy to engage people in conversation that I am ambivilent about. I avoid going to lunch or coffee with friends, which is usually the most social part of the day. There is also more time to work because I am not excusing myself for coffee and snacks, yet I probably get less work done. My attention span gets shot starting at about 2pm.
Then there are the spiritual things. We are told that every hour of this time is endued with a special spiritual potency. The time that is spent well in my consciousness and spirit is amplified, while the time I waste and misdirect feels more tragic. There are also less things to distract me from my core being, and more things to remind me of it. The day is not broken up in the same manageable chunks before and after meals; instead it is a long and drawn out marathon all day, and then all day again the next, for 19 days. I lose the strength to manage and marginalize in my mind and soul the personal and moral issues that I am facing. Food is no longer a viable way to forget and distract.
It is a direct confrontation and struggle. There are only two ways to respond to this. Either prayer is used to accept, engage, and transcend these issues, or I get resentful and crabby. There have been many times during the Fast where I have eaten just to comfort a whiny heart, and to spite any injunction that it not be pampered. There is no middle ground during the fast. Most of the time I live my life in this middle ground, a comfortable place that neither rejects nor fully accepts spiritual consciousness. Pink Floyd coined it as being "comfortably numb".
During the Fast, we have the potential to grow and evolve, or to sink into the dark depths of ourselves. It is really the only choice we have at anytime, it just becomes especially salient during these 19 days; and probably when we die.
1 comment:
That's a really beautiful way of looking at Fasting. You have great insights into the spirit of it.
I'm not fasting right now because I have a sinuous infection. I'm not bedridden or even very ill, but I need to be obedient to Baha'u'llah's instructions in this matter. It is a great test; I'm trying to keep the proper spirit for this time of year even without the physical act. You're reflections help. Thank you.
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