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Friday, August 28, 2009

The Fine Line Between Unity and Co-Dependence

Over the last few years I have reached out to a few different people interested in becoming members of the Baha'i Faith. While I do what I can to support them emotionally and spiritually, oftentimes they come to expect too much and become hurt when I can't be there for them. I try and encourage them to pray and establish a spiritual connection with God. I also do what I can to get them involved in community life. But sometimes that isn't enough, their religious connection is dependent on their connection to me, and there is only so much I can do. I cannot take that pressure, and I shouldn't have to.

So my question is, where is the line between promoting unity through developing friendships, and becoming co-dependent upon each other for spiritual sustenance? Does unity mean that everybody will be best friends with everybody else? If not, then how do we avoid forming cliques and fragmenting according into our most comfortable groups? Is there a way to have a strong group of close friends, but still interact and be unified with everybody in a challenging and meaningful way?

I am eager to hear your thoughts on these questions.

3 comments:

Lena said...

I ask myslf the same thing and dont have any insight on the posible answer

Jalal said...

My first response, to the opening paragraph is, "what would 'Abdul-Baha do?" Both "how would He support others" and "how would He develop their own strengths".

To your actual question, I think that the line is hard to find, and that's good. I think it is okay to rely on each other as much as we can bear. In nature the plants and animals rely upon each other to high extent, and yet should one animal die the others survive, albeit with initial difficulty.

Anonymous said...

although I am not a Bahai, I do believe in the spiritual unity of all living things. I believe that is a natural phenomenom of nature, wheather indiividuals are aware of it or not. That is what I believe is called spiritual awareness or concsiesness. Spirituality and awareness is something that every individual must find within themselves and in their own relationship with the Almighty (or whatever you want to name it, ie God). As the saying goes, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink". There are spiritual guides and teachers that have pointed many people to the path of spiritual realization, but it is important not to be dependant on these individuals, as the humblest and truest of spiritual teachers would encourage you to look for spirituality within, and have true awakenings. I also have come to my own realization that this is an ongoing process that never ends. There is always more to be revealed, we as human beings do not have the capacity to know it all,spiritual understanding is as infinite and eternal as the universe and God. So summing up what I am saying here, The best thing you can do is have compassion and love.